Connection in a Time of Social Distancing
Working from home is great! Except when it’s not. If you’re forced to do it, it may not be so good. Add to that the responsibility of home-schooling kids whose school is shut down and it makes the office seem much better. Even when given a choice, it’s not always the preferred option. Six years […]
Podcast Episode 62: If You Met My Family, You’d Understand-Chapter 7 Sabotage
Change in a system will bring resistance in the form of sabotage. Learning how to recognize it and how to deal with it can result in change that lasts.
Podcast Episode 61: If You Met My Family, You’d Understand-Chapter 6 The Leverage of the Dependent
It’s the conflict of wills in a system that creates anxiety. Self-differentiation reduces this. It also helps us to deal with those who are emotionally dependent and try to hold us hostage.
Podcast Episode 60: If You Met My Family, You’d Understand-Chapter 5 Process and Content
Understanding emotional process distinguishes when it’s helpful to engage in the content of the matter and when it’s best avoided. This is simple, but not easy.
Podcast Episode 59: If You Met My Family You’d Understand-Chapter 4 Triangles
When we are uncomfortable with another, we often avoid dealing directly with that relationship by triangling a third person or issue. Understanding how triangles work and how to deal with them is essential to healthy functioning.
How to Avoid a Civil War in Your Congregation (or Family)
The “Protocol of Reconciliation and Grace through Separation” that was announced in January puts The United Methodist Church on a different path than other mainline denominations that have battled over LGBTQ+ inclusion. In previous cases, the progressive wing of the denomination ultimately pushed through legislation allowing for ordination and (later) same sex weddings. This in […]
Podcast Episode 57: If You Met My Family, You’d Understand-Chapter 2 Problem and Challenge
There is a difference between a challenge and a problem. Life is filled with challenges. They only become problems when we can’t handle them. How we respond to a challenge influences whether it will become a problem.
Podcast Episode 55: A Family Systems Take on “Megxit” (Harry and Meghan Step Back from the Royal Family)
The recent announcment by Prince Harry and Meghan to step back from the Royal Family provides a look into the Windsor family of origin. As with all families, intergenerational transmission and surrounding togetherness pressures are evident. Learning from their situation can help the rest of us grow as leaders. Show notes: The British royal family […]
Podcast Episode 54: How to Have a Congregational Conversation on a Difficult Subject
If the Protocol for Separation in The United Methodist Church passes, it will require many congregations to have difficult discussions. Doing so in a way that minimizes surrounding togetherness pressure gives the congregation the best chance to do so in a healthy way.