What to Do When Things Don’t Go Your Way
One thing I tell parents when I’m promoting summer camp is that when their child comes to camp, she won’t always get her own way. It’s true. Camp is about living in community. Campers have to work together, follow a schedule and sort out their differences. This is a great thing for young people to […]
Podcast Episode 8: Why You Don’t Change Your Mind
People don’t negotitate their closely held values. Identity, belief systems and the misattribution of arousal all play a role. Effective leaders understand this and are able to say what they believe while giving others the freedom to disagree. Show notes: Why We Hate People Who Disagree: Personal Identity and Civility, by Mark Alicke, Ph.D., from […]
To Be Your Best, Find OTHER People
I recently wrote that to be your best, you need to find your people. These are the people who get you. They are professional colleagues who understand the work you do, and can help you to more effectively address the challenges you face as a leader. But that’s only half the equation. There is downside […]
Podcast Episode 7: Emotional Contagion, Humor and Anxiety Levels
Leaders who understand the effects of emotional contagion can help those they work with function at their best. This is especially true in anxiety-producing situations. Humor and playfulness affect both the leader and those around her in positive ways. Show Notes: This article explains how smiling can increase happiness. This article explains emotional contagion and […]
Podcast Episode 6: Intergenerational Communication
The Millennial generation is now the largest segment of the workforce. These four principles will help you communicate with any generation. Show Notes: This is the research from the Pew Research Center showing that Millennials are now the largest segment of the workforce. Here is the infographic that compares differents means of communication, and how […]
To Be Your Best, Find Your People
This fall I attended the annual gathering of United Methodist camp and retreat executives. These are people who hold a position similar to mine throughout our denomination. There is no one else who gets my work the way they do. They are my people. As I dictate this I am on my way to meet […]
Podcast Episode 4: Leadership through Self-Differentiation
Leading change requires the ability to express one’s own goals and values in non-anxious ways, AND to remain emotionally connected with resistors. Show notes: Generation to Generation: Family Process in Church and Synagogue, by Edwin Friedman, provides great depth on family systems theory and leadership through self-differentiation.
Podcast Episode 2: Self-Differentiation
Self-Differentiation is the key to remaining a non-anxious leader. This episode explains what it is and why it matters. Generation to Generation: Family Process in Church and Synagogue by Edwin Friedman is a great resource for understanding self-differentiation. However, it is quite dense. Many have a hard time getting through it. You can also find […]
Willpower Revisited
If you haven’t read my last post, The Myth of Self-Discipline, you might want to do so. This post is in response to feedback I received. Rev. Bud Brown emailed to challenge the idea that willpower is a limited resource. He noted that a meta-analysis of all studies since the original chocolate chip/radish experiment could […]