Podcast Episode 20: Difficult Conversations Part 1–What’s Going On in Us?
There are three potential conversations that go on in our heads when we are having a difficult conversations: What happened, feelings and identity. Understanding how these work and what to do about them is essential to being a non-anxious presence in challenging interactions. Show Notes: This podcasts references material from Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss […]
Podcast Episode 19: Self-Regulation–the Key to Being a Non-Anxious Presence
Remaining a non-anxious presence, especially in anxious situations, is the key to effective leadership. This is hard to do. You will feel anxious inside. Learning to regulate your own anxiety can help you be your most effective.
Podcast Episode 18: Pain, the Quick-Fix, Crisis, and Why It’s a Great Time to Be a United Methodist
In family systems theory, pain is an opportunity for growth. Our culture promotes pain avoidance and seeking the quick fix. Sometimes the only way to find growth is through a crisis.
The Need for Non-Anxious Leaders Is Greater than Ever
The recent blow up in the Oval Office between Donald Trump and Volodymyr Zelensky got me thinking. Effective leaders say what they believe, while giving others the freedom to disagree. This is needed now, more than ever. This is certainly true in political discourse. What was once a civil activity intended to work toward the […]
Podcast Episode 14: Murphy’s Law, Entropy and Managing Your Response
Leadership is hard. Things go wrong (a lot). Responding as a non-anxious presence is a key to effective leadership. Sometimes, it’s in the worst situations that people can produce their best work. Show Notes: Success Story: Keith Jarrett and the “Unplayable” Piano by Joseph C. Bentley, Ph.D The Koln Concert album.
Podcast Episode 11: What to Do When You Are Verbally Attacked
Remaining a non-anxious presence when someone unloads their anxiety on you is extremely difficult. Learning how emotional process works can give you the perspective to help you be calm. It can also help you to focus on how to respond to reduce the anxiety of the situation, as well avoid taking responsibility for other people’s […]
What to Do When Things Don’t Go Your Way
One thing I tell parents when I’m promoting summer camp is that when their child comes to camp, she won’t always get her own way. It’s true. Camp is about living in community. Campers have to work together, follow a schedule and sort out their differences. This is a great thing for young people to […]
Podcast Episode 8: Why You Don’t Change Your Mind
People don’t negotitate their closely held values. Identity, belief systems and the misattribution of arousal all play a role. Effective leaders understand this and are able to say what they believe while giving others the freedom to disagree. Show notes: Why We Hate People Who Disagree: Personal Identity and Civility, by Mark Alicke, Ph.D., from […]
Podcast Episode 7: Emotional Contagion, Humor and Anxiety Levels
Leaders who understand the effects of emotional contagion can help those they work with function at their best. This is especially true in anxiety-producing situations. Humor and playfulness affect both the leader and those around her in positive ways. Show Notes: This article explains how smiling can increase happiness. This article explains emotional contagion and […]