Podcast Episode 242: Self-Differentiation Is NOT Independence
Whether it’s raising kids or leading an organization, a non-anxious leader is interdependent, not independent. This episode covers why that matters and how you can do better. Show Notes: Forget independence. Teach your kids this instead. By Jennifer Breheny Wallace Check out the FREE Family Systems 101 Course. Subscribe to my weekly Two for Tuesday emails. — […]
Podcast Episode 241: The Give and Take of Self-Differentiation
There is a sweet spot in self-differentiation between defining self and staying emotionally connected. When we go astray, we end up trying to change others or letting others change us. This episode shows you how you can do better. Show Notes: The Space Between Changing Each Other by Kathleen Smith Subscribe to my weekly Two for […]
Podcast Episode 240: Non-Anxious Leaders Encourage Challenge Not Comfort
Our movement toward “therapeutic culture” has made people less resilient. This episode explains how that happened and what you can do about it as a leader. Show Notes: Hey, America, Grow Up! by David Brooks — Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/jack-shitama/message
Podcast Episode 239: 5 Ways that Mindfulness Helps You to Be a Non-Anxious Presence
Self-differentiation requires the ability to self-regulate, then act in accordance with your goals and values. Here’s how mindfulness can help you do this. Show Notes: 5 Rituals To Keep You Happy All The Time by Eric Barker Why I Invited Myself to a Wedding by Jack Shitama Subscribe to my weekly Two for Tuesday emails. — Send […]
Why I Invited Myself to a Wedding
I don’t have the gift of spiritual discernment. But my wife does. I’ve learned during our 41 years of marriage that God speaks to her, then she tells me. Even if I don’t listen to God, I listen to my wife. At the beginning of the year, she said we needed to take my mom […]
Podcast Episode 237: A Family Systems Take on Procrastination
Many, if not most of us, procrastinate. However, for some this can really be disruptive. Psychologists suggest that childhood trauma can be at the root of procrastination. This episode unpacks that concept from a family systems perspective. Show Notes: How Procrastination Can Reflect Childhood Experience by Peg Streep Generation to Generation: Family Process in Church […]
Podcast Episode 236: What Is a Boundary and Why Does It Matter?
Non-anxious leaders know the importance of boundaries and how to set them. This episode can help you do this better. Show Notes: Your boundaries set you free by Brian Stout Episode 230: How to Say “No” as a Non-Anxious Presence Subscribe to my weekly Two for Tuesday emails. — Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/jack-shitama/message
Podcast Episode 235: 3 Steps to Taking Responsibility for Self When Others Refuse to Do the Same
Self-differentiating, taking responsibility for self, can be hard when others respond by defining and blaming you. This is sabotage. Here are three steps to respond effectively. Show Notes: Generation to Generation: Family Process in Church and Synagogue by Edwin Friedman* A Failure of Nerve: Leadership in the Age of the Quick Fix by Edwin Friedman* […]
Podcast Episode 234: Non-Anxious Leaders Embrace Discomfort
According to Edwin Friedman, one of the characteristics of a chronically anxious society is the desire to seek safety instead of adventure. Non-anxious leaders seek adventure and learn to love it. Here’s how. Show Notes: The Light We Carry: Overcoming in Uncertain Times by Michelle Obama A Failure of Nerve, Revised Edition: Leadership in the […]