I went for a long run recently on a brutally hot morning. The temperature was already at 80°. Many organized running events will cancel if the start time temperature is above 80°. A few miles into the run I realized that my pace was about 30 seconds per mile faster than my normal long run pace. This might not seem like a lot, but for a recreational runner like me, it makes a big difference; especially for as hot as it was.

I realized I needed to slow down. My problem is that once I get started at a certain pace I tend to have a hard time slowing down. Even when I try to slow down I find myself going back to that pace from muscle memory.

I was getting pretty far into my run and my legs were starting to ache. I realized the best option was for me to run for a while, then walk occasionally, to give my legs a chance to recover. This way I would still meet my distance goal rather than cut my run short.

But I was resisting inside. I figured out the reason I was resisting is I didn’t want people to see me walk. I run frequently in my neighborhood and I never walk. I was afraid that if people saw me walking they would think I was weak. This was the story I was telling myself.

Whenever you are feeling resistance, fear, anxiety or reluctance, it’s good to ask, “What is the story I’m telling myself? Is it really true? Or is it just a story?”

There are two concepts that will help to unpack this.

The first is the Spotlight effect. Psychologists have shown that we tend to believe that people notice us more often than they actually do. We are not the center of their world. They are not shining a spotlight on us. We are the center of our own world, but nobody else much cares.

I realized this during my run. Nobody really cared if I was walking. I was reminded when I first became a runner about a decade ago, I liked to talk about it. Yet it seemed like nobody cared to hear. Now I never bring it up.

The other trap is Comparisonitis. Comparing ourselves to others is a loser’s game. We can always find people to make us feel good about ourselves. We can always find people to make us feel bad about ourselves.

There are people who walk around my neighborhood, run around my neighborhood and bike around my neighborhood. They are all different than I am. Their pace has nothing to do with my pace.

When I first started running I read that Ryan Hall ran a half marathon in under an hour. It blew me away. That’s 13.1 miles in less than five minutes per mile for every mile. I can’t even run one mile in five minutes. I can’t even run a quarter-mile in a five minute pace. It was then that I realized that I shouldn’t compare myself to others and their running times.

So I finished my long run. I did it by running and walking. I still felt pretty good because I finished without injury and without collapsing. I did it by questioning the story I was telling myself.